Of giving and receiving...

I'm not writing this because I have grudges against anyone but rather I'm quite confused over many different human behavior as I get to meet more and more people in my life.

First off there are those really good ones, I am now running with a bunch of colleagues whom we look after each others back when working on cases and presentations. The assistance they gave to me had been very supportive, valuable and unconditionally selfless. I'm sure they know that I am not up to the standard in terms of skills as I had just joined the department a while ago but they do give me a pat on the back for any work done well. What's more, they never see me as the eldest member of the team (which I like) because I certainly do not wish to have any special privileges due to age. If I'm wrong, just teach me - I'm so willing to learn.

Then there are those insane people. People who have no remorse for others feelings when they voice their opinions or actions. People who thinks that "I live my world and I like to say whatever I like - if you're not happy about it, just f*ck off". I can't comprehend with such behavior because I never seem to understand what world that they are looking for, what kind of people whom they would eventually look upon as "real" friends or what scenario would they finally learn from not listening to others. Sure enough these people are currently in my life and some of them even are even of my long acquaintances. They had did various damages in me in terms of financial or mentally but then again the key takeaways for me is the experience in life which they had showered me - the bad part I mean. Next time when they just happen to pop out of nowhere, I'm sure they are seeking my help or guidance on something - otherwise I doubt they even want to wish me a "Happy New Year" until February.

Of the good ones, I recently have 2 friends whom I get to know not too long ago. I can't say that I had helped them a lot in terms of work or knowledge sharing but it was quite a surprise that they had remembered me during my birthday or went overseas. Perhaps it's an obligation to them ? I doubt I had did enough to receive any token from them - sometimes a mere thought is more than sufficient. Anyhow, I had always agreed upon the concept of "Giving and receiving" but to receive only is a bit too much for me. I'm sure I'll repay them as much as possible.

Over on the other side, I also had share of giving but not receiving anything in return. Cases where your proposed christmas exchange gift activity is like a sin with the excuse because "Chrismas is about giving". Well, what about birthdays, valentines, chinese new year and such. Aren't all those are all about giving ? What's the big fuss about it anyway ? As said, I really can't comprehend with some of these people. I rather be stingy on these kind of people and pay more attention on the other kind.

All in all, I think it's to do with the heart and how each one of us were brought up. If you're special to someone, a simple token like a keychain would yield great results. Start giving something to some of your friends today (like a keychain) - it's a token of appreciation and acknowledge of their existence.

My Boy Is Growing...

There goes another weekend I spent with my little boy. This weekend was a bit hectic as both himself and Michele caught up with some flu bug and ended up infecting one another. I have to spring into action and boil some barley water and chinese ginseng tea for both of them. Hopefully they both will be better in a couple of days.

Anyway yeah, my boy is really growing. He stunned me this weekend by saying the word "please" in a very odd way. It's not like saying it in plea but rather saying it in a more fashionable way - something that sounds like "plis" period. Ah... imagine those are the first few words he is able to pick up in his life. Sometimes I am a bit concern if he is left behind in terms of growth and learning but seeing on his cheeky actions and rate of learning stuff (like opening the microwave oven and putting a phone inside) really makes me wonder...

At times I can't help but to put some form of discipline onto him. Although he's just a mere 19 months old toddler but I certainly would want him to grow up learning the right thing. I may not have a good hope for him being a book smart but certainly I can't let him off without being street smart. Likewise for myself, I may not have any bachelor degrees in life but I must admit that my hardwork and dedication on my work had paid off in most of my career life - I sure wish to see that in my little boy. Take it from your daddy - sincere, hardwork, dedication and responsibility always pays off.

In a couple of months he should start to talk and question the ways of life around him. By then my little X would have lost his "goo goo gaa gaa" (baby talk) and assume the normal conversation with everyone around him. I guess it's just one part of parenthood - where you will miss the days of your child when they were younger and it's also that same feeling that had made me who am I and sane today.

Thank you my little X, you had made my weekend - daddy will see you next week.

Happy Birthday To Me...

I always wonder what is the feeling of getting old. I mean how does the old chap who had hit 50 thought about what to do next and such. Those were the questions in which many people would had put aside and say "Later lah" but here I am... already 35 from today onwards. Such question had started pouring onto my little brain here since the clock struck 12am thus kick starting my birthday...

Anyway I never had thought of being out of this world during my birthday. I basically have everything I wished for so far. A home, a car, a son, a lovely wife and toys to keep me busy everyday. I just felt that there is a sense of loneliness and emptiness within me. Perhaps it's not like last time when I have a whole bunch of friends gathered together and celebrate it with me or a simple romantic dinner for 2 with Michele and coped with movies and such. It is now the 2nd year with X around and I guess I gotta live with the fact that he will always be there to celebrate with us. This year he may be little and still being mischievous but I'm sure he will be better by next year onwards.

So what did I wished for this year ? I think I would want to have a better financial status and stability. With little "C" at the countdown now, I foresee that we need to spend much more to cater for her needs after she's born. I hope God would have heard and answer my prayers as the days goes by. I do not wish to be filthy rich but I just wish to be a bit more of financial freedom...

With 2 presents (how many more you can expect leh) so far... I admit that it's a great birthday where you're being thrown with surprises and such but hey, at least the effort from Michele is there to see it through. Thanks Michele, you may not be the best but you're still better than many others out there...

Happy 35th birthday to me

:)